This is my first attempt at using more physical aspects to my digital things. I'll need to use a darker and thicker pen next time for my words. I have a lot of things that I'm aware would have really bad consequences, but I still want to say them for some reason. Maybe it has something to do with not knowing if the response would be good or bad, because not saying it means I'll never know. Or something like that.

There's a sort of shift in my collage style around here, I'm not sure what brought it about.... This collage is about how I sometimes think I'm too willing to ignore my own comfort for other people if I love them. I'm the sort of person who gets overly devoted to the people around me.

I started thinking about the fact that I'm the only person I know who had been kicked out of school for failing classes. I didn't really realize how much it affected me before, but it sometimes makes me feel like I'm the failure of the group. I feel like it's a bit selfish to wish someone else would have something like that happen to them just so I didn't feel alone.

I don't remember exactly when I made this because I just found it deep in my files! This is definitely one of my earlier collages, but I also wanted it to look bad. I purposefully made it with very little effort because it felt like that was all I did anyways. The different pieces in the background of this include something I wrote for the therapy group I was in, and two drawings I did in classes.

This is another mega-early piece I dug up from my files! I hadn't figured anything out but I still had plenty to say. Most of the words and pictures on this are unrelated to each other but I liked how they looked together.

I don't like the layout of this piece, but I also feel like it might encapsulate being a kid better if it's messier. This one is about the first time I thought about suicide, in my first grade class. The fact that this moment has stuck with me this long probably shows how much it still affects me today.

Following the previous collage, this one is also about how long I've been struggling with mental health. I've been coping with my illnesses for as long as I can remember, hence the way it feels like this is the only way for me to live. I know that I'll have to keep taking a large amount of medication for the rest of my life and that feels stifling for me.

I feel like I've been under a massive amount of pressure for the past 3 or 4 years, and I worry that once I really can't handle it I'll hurt the people around me. I'm really scared by even the idea of bridges collapsing. I don't want people to come down with me when I start cracking under pressure, mostly. Most of my anxieties are related to how my actions and my mental health affects others.